We’ve all been there—stressed, maybe a bit anxious, and instead of calming down, our brain decides to replay over and over again an embarrassing, mean, or just plain stupid thing we said any number of years ago. It happens and it’s rarely helpful. Though we can’t control the random flood of negative self-talk, we can do something about how it makes us feel. Forgiving yourself for past mistakes (big or small), accepting that you cannot go back and change it, and taking stock of moment-to-moment gratitude is a great way to practice self-care, even in your lowest moments.
Get Out director, Jordan Peele, developed a thought-provoking script and crafted a suspenseful thriller wrapped in powerful social commentary. I can’t say it enough, but if you haven’t seen it, you should see it! If you’ve only seen it once, make sure you grab it on DVD in May and share with a friend!
As someone who has dedicated their career to working on issues and creating messages that positively impact women, girls, and families, seeing this movie was a must. What I found was an experience and story that left me speechless, humbled, and tremendously grateful for every word. This film brilliantly brings to life the unsettling realities and complex effects of racism in America. It touches on so many social issues of family, society, and culture that I’m still thinking about it (and talking about it constantly with my husband)!
Here’s why you should see it a few times:
- Shortly after its’ release, Get Out has become the highest-grossing movie ever for a feature debut for a writer/director of an original screenplay. Patronizing great films gives room and resources for more great films to hit the box office!
- Seeing a suspenseful thriller that also has a strong comedic timing is a rarity! This movie will surprise you with elements that normally go unseen in blockbuster thrillers.
- It’s a great opportunity to just listen in. With so much noise in our political climate, we need the chance to listen to necessary, yet sometimes overlooked perspectives. Through Get Out, Jordan presents a unique point-of-view on a very specific cultural experience through a multidimensional lens that can resonate with any viewer.
- Full of subliminal messages, it’s impossible to catch everything the first time. A second viewing offers a deeper look and listening of messages concerning race, relationships, family, culture, and society to name a few.
- It adds more concrete proof that stories produced and directed by people of color are profitable for the entertainment industry in more ways than one.
There’s so much to unpack from Get Out, and I can’t wait to see Jordan Peele’s next project!
Most writers will tell you they’ve suffered blocks where they focus on assignments and just can’t break through. Then one day they’re walking, showering, or shopping and BOOM! It all starts flowing. Well self-care can be a lot like writing. It requires focus, reflection, and self-expression. It’s a lot, and sometimes doesn’t flow as easily as we’d like. Volunteering is a great way to get your mind off of you. While doing good for others you can break through your self-care rut and feed the part of you that naturally nurtures.
Between all the online petitions circulating it’s easy to feel like signing your name is enough, but if you’ve ever gone to a rally in person you know THAT actually showing up makes all the difference. Just like texting with friends about planning to meet is different than actually hanging out. One is about aligning your good intentions; the other is about aligning your actions to your values. When we show up, we share a commitment to a result; even if it’s a great night out with friends. In our digital world, it can feel easier to hide behind a screen, but nothing replaces the thrill of honoring your word and being there for yourself and others.
I’m not always the best at receiving compliments (I’m working on it!), but I’m great at giving them. That’s why I can attest that a good way to practice self-care is to tell someone why you love them. Not only is it nice to let someone know that you do, but also when you can articulate why — it gives you a deeper appreciation of ALL the good that is in your life.
You know that peaceful moment at the end of the day when the whole world goes quiet and you’re left with just you and your thoughts?
These days if we want a little solitude we must make a conscious effort.
Take a moment, a day, or a week (okay, fine start with 10 minutes) and create a moment without distraction.
Then rinse and repeat.
This is a fundamental foundation of self-care. You deserve it.
The old adage “choose your battles” has never been more applicable.
With the constant flood of news and 24-hour social media access, simply choosing who and what to engage can be exhausting.
We wade into difficult conversations and there are always some folks who want to gaslight, harass, and derail us.
It’s not constructive. It’s not healthy.
And guess what? It’s not mandatory that you engage. Part of self-care is choosing to opt out.
Don’t feed a troll. Block them!
Every time I stretch my body it always feels SO good. But I rarely do it. I just don’t think about it.
But we need to stretch to push our bodies, minds, and attitudes.
When we lean into the moments of discomfort, we can become more flexible on the other side.
Same is true for making social change. If we want to see the world differently, we have to stretch our own world view. So choose one thing this week that makes you stretch and go for it. Stepping out of our comfort zone keeps us curious.
And curiosity is a key tool for living a life well examined.
What will you stretch this week?
Congrats, we made it.
Still looking around a shit show of a government transition coming up.
And a year-long adventure of learning how to take care of ourselves while still fighting for civil and reproductive rights. You know, stuff you didn’t think you had to fight for in 2017!
But lest we fall into a slump of despair (that was SO last year) here is my pledge to you:
Let’s focus on Self-Care in 2017. In order to be good world changers, we have to start locally.
And I mean, super local…ourselves first. If we aren’t full of hope, anger, action, and community we just won’t get this world-changing work done. And as any good rule breaker, rebel maker, world changer knows…we have to fill up our gas tanks regularly in order to have the energy to SHAKE. SHIT. UP.
So here we go…each week I’m going to post one tip to help us focus on self-care while we also focus on making sure we America’s democracy doesn’t slip away while we are sleeping (or on our phones).
I know it can get overwhelming. And we’ll want to numb out (again: phones) but try not to. Know that we are in this together. And please: if you have any self-care tips to add to this vibrant list – please send them our way on any of my social platforms (Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn) and help a sister out!
For this very beautiful first week of the year, my first #SelfCare17 tip is to: Release
Whenever you are close to releasing something negative in your life (a relationship, a habit, a belief system) it’s normal that your old patterns will come up? They are usually there for you to see how far you’ve come or to gauge how far you are willing to go to change your life. Don’t get stuck in the past. Focus on releasing that which does not serve you anymore. You will create a space for what is to come. And it’s going to be so good, I feel it!
Remember, release is a verb – practice it daily. Don’t hold on to stuff that isn’t yours. And make that space.
Most days when I sit down to write these posts, I have no idea where to start.
I think about writing something witty, snarky, silly.
I think about using the time to uplift, inspire, educate.
I feel pressure to speak about my work, the business, stuff that makes money.
But if I’m silent enough. And still enough. What comes to me is this…
Sometimes I don’t want to write anything. I want to be in gestation, growing new ideas and thoughts. I don’t always want to produce for production sake, and I don’t want to worry about whether or not it gets a response.
Today is our National Day of Listening, and that’s exactly what I decided to do.
In the silence, I can hear a smaller voice emerge, one that says to take a step back not forward. To sit not pace. To listen, not talk. And if I do listen, I can hear the tiny sounds of new ideas rushing to be formed and my patience rising up like a swell.
I sit and I listen.
And I always end up writing.
But it’s never what I thought it would be.
If you’re looking for something to listen to that will spark your inspiration and help you explore your inner thoughts, tune-in to our Talk To Jess podcast today or sometime this weekend.