You’d be amazed by how many women say the worst thing they can do at work is cry. Women have been so conditioned to be ashamed of their feelings that we think of them as liabilities. That doesn’t have to be the case. We have emotions for a reason and acknowledging those feelings is healthy and an important part of our personal growth. I think about emotions as two separate words E- Motions. E= energy in Motion. It has to move through your body to come out and be released. Letting go and sharing our feelings is not only necessary in self-care, it’s vital to our own sanity.
We’ve all been there—stressed, maybe a bit anxious, and instead of calming down, our brain decides to replay over and over again an embarrassing, mean, or just plain stupid thing we said any number of years ago. It happens and it’s rarely helpful. Though we can’t control the random flood of negative self-talk, we can do something about how it makes us feel. Forgiving yourself for past mistakes (big or small), accepting that you cannot go back and change it, and taking stock of moment-to-moment gratitude is a great way to practice self-care, even in your lowest moments.
Get Out director, Jordan Peele, developed a thought-provoking script and crafted a suspenseful thriller wrapped in powerful social commentary. I can’t say it enough, but if you haven’t seen it, you should see it! If you’ve only seen it once, make sure you grab it on DVD in May and share with a friend!
As someone who has dedicated their career to working on issues and creating messages that positively impact women, girls, and families, seeing this movie was a must. What I found was an experience and story that left me speechless, humbled, and tremendously grateful for every word. This film brilliantly brings to life the unsettling realities and complex effects of racism in America. It touches on so many social issues of family, society, and culture that I’m still thinking about it (and talking about it constantly with my husband)!
Here’s why you should see it a few times:
- Shortly after its’ release, Get Out has become the highest-grossing movie ever for a feature debut for a writer/director of an original screenplay. Patronizing great films gives room and resources for more great films to hit the box office!
- Seeing a suspenseful thriller that also has a strong comedic timing is a rarity! This movie will surprise you with elements that normally go unseen in blockbuster thrillers.
- It’s a great opportunity to just listen in. With so much noise in our political climate, we need the chance to listen to necessary, yet sometimes overlooked perspectives. Through Get Out, Jordan presents a unique point-of-view on a very specific cultural experience through a multidimensional lens that can resonate with any viewer.
- Full of subliminal messages, it’s impossible to catch everything the first time. A second viewing offers a deeper look and listening of messages concerning race, relationships, family, culture, and society to name a few.
- It adds more concrete proof that stories produced and directed by people of color are profitable for the entertainment industry in more ways than one.
There’s so much to unpack from Get Out, and I can’t wait to see Jordan Peele’s next project!
As girls, we are taught to say yes, even at the expense of our own heart. As women, we can be so worried that people won’t like us, that we talk ourselves into something we don’t want. Not only is this unhealthy, but it’s dangerous! Do yourself a favor, and practice saying no. Even when you are uncomfortable, even when you don’t feel like it, saying no is like exercising a muscle, it needs repetition. No is not only a full sentence, but for many, a first step in really learning to love yourself.
When you’re dedicated to self-improvement, it’s easy to take on too much. But we’re only human and it’s important to remember people like limits. Children thrive when adults set clear boundaries. The challenge comes when you’re an adult and you must set your own. Instead of thinking about it as self-denial or even self-discipline shift your perspective. Setting boundaries is a great form of self-protection and another opportunity to figure out how to express yourself within safe confines. It’s a way to better understand who you are, what you’re comfortable with, and how you want others to treat you. Setting boundaries is integral to building a healthy relationship with yourself and others.
Most writers will tell you they’ve suffered blocks where they focus on assignments and just can’t break through. Then one day they’re walking, showering, or shopping and BOOM! It all starts flowing. Well self-care can be a lot like writing. It requires focus, reflection, and self-expression. It’s a lot, and sometimes doesn’t flow as easily as we’d like. Volunteering is a great way to get your mind off of you. While doing good for others you can break through your self-care rut and feed the part of you that naturally nurtures.
The only thing worse than not being able to think of a perfect comeback in the moment is when you know exactly what you want to say but don’t. With generations of women being taught to be seen and not heard, it’s easy to fall into silence even when you have something valid to say. Part of self-care is recognizing that what’s within you is of value, and that includes your words. It may take practice to get out what you want to say, but don’t let that stop you. Sometimes I have to rehearse so that the words are really mine and I believe them. Your words are important. Don’t let them go unspoken.
Between all the online petitions circulating it’s easy to feel like signing your name is enough, but if you’ve ever gone to a rally in person you know THAT actually showing up makes all the difference. Just like texting with friends about planning to meet is different than actually hanging out. One is about aligning your good intentions; the other is about aligning your actions to your values. When we show up, we share a commitment to a result; even if it’s a great night out with friends. In our digital world, it can feel easier to hide behind a screen, but nothing replaces the thrill of honoring your word and being there for yourself and others.
In our effort to resist this administration’s hateful policies and rhetoric, it’s important that we recognize the power in each other. It’s not just about marching side-by-side or rocking a safety pin. For too long, too many of us have been bystanders instead of upstanders, and “allies” instead of accomplices (shout out to my friend Luvvie for that idea). Part of forming strong alliances is acting on those connections. Challenge yourself to not only learn about other people’s experiences but also actively support and defend their rights with the same fervor you do your own. Embracing intersectionality is key to achieving justice.
It’s no secret that we’re stronger together and we all need each other right now. Let’s get in formation together. Join my community: http://bit.ly/JessCommunityNotes